Saturday, August 18, 2007

Do I look that bad???

Shortly after my last post, I boarded a plane for a flight to Atlanta. The flight was scheduled for 6am, so I was up and out of bed by 3:45am. Needless to say, I only got a couple hours of sleep.

The funniest thing happened as I crossed the threshold onto the plane. As usual, the flight attendant was there to greet every passenger as he or she boarded. While most people got the obligatory "good morning" or "welcome aboard", I got a very unique response. Upon my embarkation, I was greeted with "It looks like someone missed their morning coffee!"

Utterly confused and put on tilt by this statement I just smiled and nodded and plodded along towards row 35, seat A. While making my way to the back of the plane, I brushed off the comment as an idiotic statement.

About 30 minutes later, the flight attendants were finishing drink service and of course I was in one of the last rows to be served. The same flight attendant looked at me and instead of asking what I would like, simply asked "Coffee, sir?"

I replied, "No, I'll have a tomato juice, I don't drink coffee!"

Granted, it was early and I am sure I had a rather grim look on my face, but how bad must one look for a flight attendant to assume its ok to make comments like that? Give me a break, it was a 6 AM FLIGHT on a Saturday morning!!!!

Has this ever happened before????

The White House announced that after only about 1 year on the job Press Secretary Tony Snow s leaving. Following the recent defections from the White House ship, one is left to ponder if he is just the next rat jumping off a sinking ship. The fact he is following Karl Rove out the door less than a week later isn't even the interesting part.

Mr. Snow announced that his reason for leaving is financial and that his post does not pay enough. Its hard to believe that any member of the government so highly placed as the White House Press Secretary would ever use such an excuse. Its a sad commentary on our nation, but nearly all politicos are wealthy and in the current administration this is even more true.

The big question is, how much is Mr. Snow making that isn't "enough?" Tony Snow's government salary is $168,000 per year. Let that sink in...$168,000 is such a hardship on this man that he has to quit his job as Press Secretary to the most powerful man in the world. $168,000 is almost 4 times the National Average household income (as reported by the US Census in 2003) of $43,318. I feel for Mr. Snow, I can't imagine living off a salary of only $168,000 with all the perks and benefits that come with being the mouthpiece of the President. The notion is asinine. If the White House didn't want Tony Snow's departure to look like their administration is crumbling, couldn't they have come up with a better excuse or is Mr. Snow so far separated from the average American that he is burdened by an income (paid by their taxes no less) that is unapproachable for all but the wealthiest in this country.

And the White House insists they have the average American in mind when making policy decisions. They are clearly out of touch with reality.

Monday, August 13, 2007

And the floor show is free

I live about 90 miles from my primary client. As a result I drive altogether too regularly on the same state roads. Late yesterday afternoon while I was making a return trip home, I stopped into a Taco Bell (I know, what the hell was I thinking?) for a quick bite as I hadn't eaten all day.

When I pulled in, I remembered a previous stop at this same establishment. That day, the shift manager - a portly blonde woman in her early 40s who was probably attractive in High School until life beat her down - spent the entire time I was there creating drama. This was not the normal boss/employee drama. It was more like high school girl drama. Her daughter came in and was at the counter begging for a dollar. Not money, a single dollar. The discussion quickly became an argument about where her money had gone, how the mother had no money on her, what the girl was going to use the money for and on and on. I was on the brink of giving this girl a dollar just to shut up, but I was beat to it by one of the other Taco Bell employees. Thinking the incident was over, I sat down to eat. Then, the generous girl runs out the door of the restaurant and yells "You better not be buyin' no cigarettes or I'll come git my dollar back!"

Fast forward to yesterday....Imagine my joy when I walked in and the same shift manager was working. No sooner had I ordered than a young lady entered to work her shift. Immediately the fireworks between the manager and girl started. "How did you get here? You mean my daughter didn't drive you? What do you mean she's a bitch? You're a bitch!" All while the Manager is standing behind the counter and the girl is sitting in the dining area about 20 feet away. Classic stuff. Meanwhile another young employee's shift ends and there are a couple guys she knew in the restaurant. She walks around the front counter and in one motion removes her work shirt, but leaves it hanging around her neck like a ten year-old playing Superman. I catch the following exchange between her and her acquaintances.

Girl: "Yeah, I'll be back in school"
Friend: "I though you was a senior"
Girl: "I was. Will be again. Can't wait!"
Friend: "What? You failed?"
Girl: (bragging tone) "Yeah, I only got 10 credits, I failed math. It's cool."

Shortly thereafter, having my fill of the bizarre and depressing I left and was on my way home. Truly a sad commentary on the people working at that Taco Bell....but you know what? I'll stop in there again some time. You can't beat the free floor show!

Sunday, August 5, 2007

The Middle Lane

If my experiences over the last couple weeks area any indication, we are facing an epidemic.

First, I passed a guy changing his flat tire in the middle lane. The guy was completely oblivious to the havoc he was wreaking on the traffic pattern. A day or two later, I was in a traffic jam at rush hour. Lo and behold when I get to the constriction, there is a small fender bender in the middle lane. Both drivers were out of the car, on their cell phones and just hanging out. They were less than a block from a large parking lot. The final sign of the impending downfall of driving etiquette appeared to me a few days later. I was pulling off the highway and saw a police car with its lights on in the center lane of the exit ramp. When I approached, I saw the police officer clearly writing a citation - while blocking the center lane of an off ramp.

People, the middle lane is for driving. If you get a flat tire, pull over. If you get in a fender bender, pull over. If a police officer is pulling you over....do just that, pull over! If you are an officer, and you are writing someone a ticket in the center lane of the road, you should just go ahead and write yourself a ticket for idiocy.

Friday, July 27, 2007

GOP leaders think we're the idiots

Yesterday, several Republican Senators led by Richard Burr (NC), Mel Martinez (FL), Tom Coburn (OK) and Bob Corker (TN) at the behest of the GOP introduced a Health Insurance Bill. This piece of legislation basically grants refundable tax credits of up to $5,400 per family to help offset individualized health insurance costs. Sadly the bill is extremely flawed.

For years, the Democratic party has been calling for changes in the Health Insurance system to make health care more affordable to all Americans. Only now that the Republicans have lost control of the Congress and are teetering on losing the White House does the GOP show interest in the biggest domestic issue of the day. Republicans controlled both the Senate and House of Representatives during the majority of the Bush Administration and yet did very little to address this issue.

Immediately following the unveiling of the Republican plan, advocates of uninsured opposed the plan as bad for low-income families. It seems that $5,400 a year doesn't really buy much health insurance for a family even when subsidized by employers. Additionally, Senator Burr revealed that the bill would begin taxing the value of employer provided health care. By doing so, eventually less Americans will be insured by their employers. The question is, who benefits from this plan.

The answer is all too familiar when the GOP is involved...big businesses. Employers will not alter compensation plans when employees lose or opt out of their health care plans and as a result, the employer share of health insurance will become profits. This plan is a veiled attempt to put public tax dollars into the pockets of big companies and again the wealthiest among us will gain and the poorest will once again finance those gains.

This bill wasn't conceived to become law. Nearly all of the Democratic candidates for President are members of congress, including Senators Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, Joe Biden and Chris Dodd. Due to the flaws of this plan, all of the Senators will vote against it. The Republican Party will no doubt make note of this. Brace yourself now, because next November every interview, campaign ad and speech from each and every Republican in the country will focus on the Democratic nominee voting against a Universal Health Care bill.

This is just the first step in what is sure to be another campaign of falsehoods and misdirection engineered by the GOP - the people who think that we are all idiots.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

A Story

Today I went to lunch with a couple friends at a pizza place. I was reminded of the last time a couple of us went to that particular restaurant.

First, the pizza restaurant in question is an icon in the town its located. The place has little to no air-conditioning and you can actually see the sweat pouring off people. I guess its their way of making pizza healthy by melting off the water weight while you eat. When you order pizza by the slice they don't bother with plates of any kind, they just put a piece of paper on your tray and slap a scalding hot slice of pie onto that. All that said, the pizza is top shelf and the garlic butter is out of this world.

On to the story. About four or five of us were eating and there was a guy in all black in the restaurant by the back door. We noticed him, but since all employees at the restaurant wear similar garb, paid no attention. At the conclusion of our meal, we grabbed our trays and made for the back door where there is trash can. The gentleman reached out to one of my compatriots to take his tray. Thinking the guy worked at the restaurant, my friend gladly handed it over. To the shock and astonishment of us all, the guy proceeded to eat the leftover pizza crusts off the tray.

Monday, July 23, 2007

HUH!??!?!

I just saw a TV commercial that threw me all out of whack. The ad was for a drug called Mirapex which is prescribed to treat "restless leg syndrome" - which by the way about everyone who knows me will tell you I must suffer from. The ad is your usual prescription medication spot with a woman's voice extolling the virtues of the drug. When she got to the side effects part of the script I thought I heard something. Rewound and replayed it just so I was sure about what I heard.

There is was...."Notify your doctor if you suffer from gambing, sexual urges or any other compulsive behavior." GAMBLING? They have a drug with gambling as a side effect? Is this for real? A quick Google search and here it is...Miraplex Class Action

Maryland is screwed up

A man in Maryland accused of sexual abuse (on a 7 year old girl) has been released and his case dropped by the judge. Apparently Mahamu Kanneh is from Liberia and speaks a tribal dialect which made it difficult to find an interpreter to work the three year old case. This person attended high school and community college in the United States and spoke English to the investigators of the case, but all of a sudden has been released because they couldn't find an interpreter. Three interpreters were found, one who quit due to the horrific nature of the case, one who was removed for incompetence and one who never showed up.

I am a big fan of individual rights and understand the need to protect those rights among them, the right to a speedy trial. What about the right of the victim to justice? More importantly, in 3 years they couldn't find a single person to interpret for the trial? In that time, the could have taken a rowboat, rowed to Liberia, learned the language and rowed back. This is a ridiculous miscarriage of justice and worse yet the judicial system of Maryland has given everyone who speaks a language from a specific part of the world the opportunity to get away with criminal activity by claiming they do not understand enough English to stand trial without an interpreter. Truly a disgusting and damning example of a flawed judicial system.

Split blogs

FYI - I have created a second blog for sports-only topics. I will continue to post all other topics here. Please visit both, one or neither as your tastes allow.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

I wish I had a video phone

I hesitate to even write this as I feel my wordsmith skills may not be up to the task.

A friend of mine asked me to join her and a couple of her friends for dinner and a trip to a club in Orange Park. I was promised that the trip to this dance club would be unforgettable. There is no doubt that my friend came through with the promise.

When we walked into the club/bar there were only a handful of people there and to be honest it was a fairly normal crowd if a little on the older side. It was Ladies night, so I was hopeful there would be at least something to look at. Boy was I wrong.

Around 11 pm a flood of people from every walk of life poured into the joint. Every walk of life but the one that includes attractive people or those who can actually move in rhythm. We were treated to a surreal scene. Many of the women who entered were dressed as if the 80s never ended. One lady looked like she stole her outfit from Cher's closet and another clearly got her garb from a closeout of Mama Cass' worldly possessions.

Every time I turned my head I saw something more disturbing than before. There was a guy in leather pants dancing like Michael Jackson circa 1985 and another guy whose dancing is truly indescribable the best I can do is Mick Jagger rolling on ecstasy. In the corner there was a group constantly "swapping" partners. Not one person in that "lifestyle" group was even remotely attractive.

All in all, a good time of people watching.

Friday, July 20, 2007

NBA Official on the Take

The big news today in sports was the revelation that the FBI is investigating an NBA referee for gambling. Apparently this ref was betting on games and worse on games that he was working. The allegations include affecting the point spread in games in favor of the bets he made.

While there are obvious implications to these actions, the not as obvious is the possible implication of the NBA and its Commissioner David Stern in fixing games. For years there have been conspiracy theories linking officiating in the NBA to fixing games or series to favor television match-ups in the playoffs. If charges are filed against this referee, you can rest assured that any impropriety from the league office by way of directing referees to deviate from standard rules will be used as a defense.

One can easily imagine testimony about league personnel directing officials to keep games close or give special treatment to star players. The rumors and innuendo have existed for years. Broadcasters and media even joke about "star treatment" or "rookie calls" on a regular basis. The NBA leadership must be quaking in their boots, but maybe not for the reasons you would think.

Please do not let me end up like this

I went to Barnes & Noble with the best and most innocent of intentions - to find a new book to read. While perusing the store, I noticed a guy down the aisle from me was reading something and was really into it. He was twisting and turning the book, bringing it nearer his face and pulling it away. He was about 45 years old, short, bald, dressed like he was auditioning for Beauty and the Geek and grinning ear to ear.

My curiosity got the best of me and I started in his direction as non-chalantly as possible. As I approached, the section titles ticked off....Computer Programming...Management....Self Help. I thought maybe he was reading "Chicken Soup for the Middle Aged Geeks Soul." Three more steps and to both my horror and amusement, I noticed he was standing in front of the Human Sexuality section.

The guy was devouring the Kama Sutra like a 13 year old boy who just found his dad's Playboy collection. It was clear that this particular volume was his third or fourth selection from the rack. All I could think was I had just stepped into the 40 Year Old Virgin, a TV Commercial or quite possibly the path of a serial killer.

Man, this guy has been around!

I wrote this a couple weeks ago and thought it would be a good start to share here.

I woke up this morning wondering which active major league baseball player has had the best teammates over the course of his career. I know, I need to stop drinking before bed.

Clearly it has to be a player in his 40s who has played for multiple teams. I started my research with Roger Clemens, Randy Johnson and Jamie Moyer. Both have played with some exceptional teammates and even a handful of Hall of Fame players, but there are significant holes in their all-time teammate roster.

Then it dawned on me, there was only one guy who could deliver a teammate line-up that couldn't be topped. In fact, every player on his "all teammate" starting line-up and five man pitching rotation is either in the hall of fame or on the way. Of course, this man is the venerable (if not ancient) Julio Franco.

Without further adeiu, the "All-Franco" Team is:

C Ivan Rodriguez
1B Pete Rose
2B Jeff Kent
SS Omar Vizquel
3B Mike Schmidt
OF Sammy Sosa
OF Manny Ramirez
OF Gary Sheffield
DH Eddie Murray

SP Steve Carlton
SP Nolan Ryan
SP Greg Maddux
SP Phil Niekro
SP Tom Glavine

CL John Smoltz

The bench is almost equally loaded:

C Sandy Alomar
1B Raphael Palmeiro, Frank Thomas, Jim Thome, Carlos Delgado, Fred McGriff
SS Jose Reyes, Rafael Furcal
3B Wade Boggs, Chipper Jones, David Wright
OF Carlos Beltran, Juan Gonzalez, Andruw Jones
DH Jose Canseco, Harold Baines
SP Pedro Martinez, Bartolo Colon, Bert Blyleven
CL Rich "Goose" Gossage, Billy Wagner

In all, there are 4 of the 27 men in the 3,000 hit club; 5 of the 21 men in the 500 HR club - with another 7 over 400 HRs; 4 of the 20 men in the 300 win club - with Glavine knocking on the door at 298; 5 of the 14 men in the 3,000 strikeout club - plus Pedro at 2,998 and Smoltz nearly at 2,900. This list includes the all-time record holder in hits, strikeouts, no-hitters, at-bats and games played.

I challenge you to find another active player with a better roster of teammates over his MLB career.

Introduction to my blog

In starting this blog, I simply hope to create an outlet for my ideas, thoughts and experiences. As I post more, I hope you - the reader - will be at times entertained and at times provoked to think. The topics I will cover will range from sports to politics to my everyday life experiences.

I thrive on feedback and would love to hear all opinions. Enjoy.